Jesus Comes A-Knockin’

There’s something about this image that really bothers me.

I think it’s the lost look on his face. Like he’s not sure whether he’s at the right house or not.

But maybe… just maybe… he’s been knocking awhile. And nobody’s coming. No one’s opening the door for Jesus.

I guess, what this picture is really asking is: Why is no one “letting Jesus in”?

Well, judging by the picture, it’s pretty late.

And, with the exception of the staff in his hand, there’s no real clues as to what he wants. He could just want to say “hey”, but he might want to hang out. Usually I’m cool with that, but sometimes he just keeps going, you know? On and on and on, and then you’re like “Hey, you know, might be about time to head out?” And he’s all, “I don’t know. I’m pretty hungry.”

And you can’t not feed him. So you give him the smallest piece of fish and tiniest bit of bread you’ve got in the whole house. Lo and behold, two minutes later, the jackass has multiplied his snack into a three hour meal. By this point he’s usually got about three glasses of “water” in him, so it’s only seconds before he starts in on the apostles. Who’s the Greater, who’s the Lesser, you know, all that stuff. After about two more glasses he’ll “accidentally” take a walk on our indoor pool, saying things like “Oh, is this not floor? This felt like floor to me.”

After that it’s not really a question of whether he’s staying the night, it’s just a question of where. Then he starts in on the whole “oh, i’ll just sleep in the barn. Yeah. Don’t worry about me. I’m a barn baby. I’m a manger man. Just a dirty floor and a couple animals, and it’s lights out, Jesus.”

So you kind of half offer him your bed, but not really. To which he responds “Are you sure?” Which is really the most jackass response you can give because it’s like a “yes, i’ll take it, but only if you offer it to me one more time.”

And then you’re up all night. Sleeping god knows where. Worried out of your mind because tomorrow morning you have to somehow throw Jesus Christ out of your house. And you can no longer use the only real weapon you had: “It’s late.”

So knowing what you know now. Knowing all this. Take a look back at that picture.

Yeah. It’s a lot scarier than you thought it was, isn’t it?

Tags: , , ,