Posts Tagged ‘Dolph Lundgren’

He’s the Tallest Skeleton In Your Closet

Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008

Hey, check out this guy

Once lauded as “The World’s Greatest Entertainer”, he has quickly become the source of cheap amusement, some stooping so low as to openly mock him in online blogs.

I’m, of course, speaking of our friend pictured above: Dolph Lundgren.

Now, I know what you’re gonna say: “Wow. He aged really well.” And I agree, the man still knows how to use his lips. But that aside. I want you to take some time right now and use it the way God intended, thinking about Dolph.

Think about “Universal Solder”.

Think about “Rocky IV”

Think about “Masters of the Universe”. He was He-man, you guys. He-man. He killed Frank Langella, and he did it for all the right reasons.

You know his name’s not really Dolph. It’s Hans. He changed it. Changed it for you. So that you’d have the opportunity to call another human being “Dolph”. So you could call his mom at home and say, “Is Dolph in?”, and then stifle your laughs before screaming “I must break you!” and slamming down the phone . He did all that for you.

The least you could do is stop thinking about Emilio Estevez, FOR ONCE, and focus on one of your long forgotten friends.

He-man, you guys.  He-man.

(NOTE: Please use the comments section to share your favorite Dolph Lundgren experience.  And yes.  You do have one.)